response to musings

i was just gonna comment on jessy's blog, but my comment got reli long, hence the blog post.

i think it's more that people change how they ACT around others, as opposed to changing who they are. who they are does affect how their actions change depending on the company, however. some people get shy around certain people, even if they're usually outgoing, some people feel emboldened in the company of certain people, even if they're shy, and certain people may have those sort of effects on others. depending on the person, they may intimidate or unmeeken (yay new words) others.

as for fronts, putting them up does make you not real, because you're acting different in putting up the front. again, though, the fronts you put up are part of who you are, but they're still fronts. that dishonesty in appearances is part of who you are, as are the type of fronts you choose to put up. everyone puts up some front at some point, i think, so this isn't directed at any one person.

sure, fronts may honestly be how you deal with certain situations, but by putting them up, you're pretending and not being true to whoever you're talking to. i think stew said it amazingly when talking about love: "what does this feeling mean to you, both to be seen, and to be seen through." if you love someone, you understand them inside and out. you can see through their facades, their defenses against the world, because they let you inside their mind and heart. conversely, in love, you have to let down your defenses for someone, leaving you vulnerable and without working fronts, because they should know you well enough to see through the act.

i'm rambling, but yes, your fronts are a part of who you are, but a part you need to cast aside to really be yourself. fronts are....a construct, a mask you put on to fool the world into thinking that you are a certain way. the face on the mask is a product of your personality and how you choose to cope, but it's not REALLY you, because you have to consciously act or react in a certain way. sometimes fronts are necessary, but the more you put them up, the less clear your true face becomes, so beware.